Homesick

Never have I received a homemade giftie so lovely -the quilt top beautifully made by one of Bart's co-workers and shown to us before going to the quilters - arrived at the rental house this week.  Its funny how the kids have gravitated to it, all wanting to wrap up in it.  It made me realize how homesick we all are - not just for the house itself, but for our things - our homemade things, our family pictures, the children's artwork, our dishes, our furniture.  The quilt is a tangible reminder of warmth, not just by the physical warmth it provides, but by the way it injected a bit of home into our house.

Today, we received the inventory list from the warehouse that lists every item removed from our house, its tag number, box number and condition when it left the house.   I cried when I saw it.  To see your life on paper in this way is a bit sickening.  Everything that we asked them to try to restore from our bedrooms is listed as "heavily smoked." Some lines even say burnt.   Only one thing came out of William's room - a glazed ceramic cross that was hanging above his door.  It was hanging on a 6 inch square piece of black drywall - the only drywall left in the room.  It had been a gift from a friend at William's christening almost 5 years ago and I found it striking that it was the only thing left in the room.  I hope it can be cleaned.  The only funny thing about the list was that almost everything we own was listed as scratched.  I think they figured that we have three kids, everything must be scratched!

What this list doesn't tell is the emotional attachment to these things.  The first line is not just "white baby bed", it is "white baby bed that Bart made when we were expecting Caroline", "wood chiffrobe" is actually "awesome hot pink stained American Girl armoire with glass crystal knobs handmade by Bart for Caroline" and "red stain dresser" is actually "copy of Pottery Barn Kids dresser that Bart made for Owen when he moved into his big boy room."   In fact, this whole list was either built by, or an antique refinished by, Bart.  Oh I hope I hope they can be restored, but it seems doubtful.

On a better note, I was very happy to see the birthday plates that I paint for the children each year listed on the kitchen list, safe and sound.

By the time we see these plates again, Owen will have one more - because time is passing here at the rental house.  I have never in my life wanted to speed up time like I do now.  As I sit here listening to my children play in the background, I am homesick, yet I am home.  For now, their laughter is enough.  The stuff will come later.